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'Star Wars' Delivered A Brilliant Response To The White House's Death Star Rejection

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palpatine star wars

The White House doesn't get the last say about the Death Star. 

Friday, the Obama administration poked fun at "Star Wars" when it turned down a "We the People" petition to construct a Death Star.

The colorful response reasoned the Administration didn't support blowing up planets and called out a structural weakness that led to Luke Skywalker destroying it single handedly.  

The White House also estimated it would cost nearly $850 quadrillion of taxpayers dollars to build. 

In response, the Galactic Empire issued a mock statement to the White House via StarWars.com. In it, the Empire called out "Earth's exaggerated claims of there being a weakness in the Death Star design" and the exorbitant estimated construction price tag. 

Read the hilarious letter below: 

IMPERIAL CENTER, CORUSCANT -- The overwhelming military superiority of the Galactic Empire has been confirmed once again by the recent announcement by the President of the United States that his nation would not attempt to build a Death Star, despite the bellicose demands of the people of his tiny, aggressive planet. "It is doubtless that such a technological terror in the hands of so primitive a world would be used to upset the peace and sanctity of the citizens of the Galactic Empire," said Governor Wilhuff Tarkin of the Outer Rim Territories. “Such destructive power can only be wielded to protect and defend by so enlightened a leader as Emperor Palpatine.” 

Representatives on behalf of the nation-state leader from the unimaginatively named planet refused to acknowledge the obvious cowardice of their choice, preferring instead to attribute the decision to fiscal responsibility. “The costs of construction they cited were ridiculously overestimated, though I suppose we must keep in mind that this miniscule planet does not have our massive means of production,” added Admiral Conan Motti of the Imperial Starfleet. 

Emissaries of the Emperor also caution any seditious elements within the Galactic Senate not to believe Earth’s exaggerated claims of there being a weakness in the Death Star design. “Any attacks made upon such a station — should one ever be built — would be a useless gesture,” added Motti.

SEE ALSO: Netflix nabs Cartoon network, Adult Swim shows in new deal with Warner Bros. >

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Jessica Simpson Will Produce & Star In NBC Comedy About Her Life—Here's Today's Buzz

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  • Jessica Simpson Eric JohnsonJessica Simpson is set star in an NBC comedy pilot based on her lifeSimpson said in a statement on Tuesday, “I often find myself thinking that no one could ever make up the things that actually happen in my life — so between the real life elements and a great team of writers, I think we’ll have people laughing!” She will also executive produce the untitled project, along with her dad and manager, Joe Simpson.
  • Oxygen has decided to cancel the controversial reality show "All My Babies' Mamas" ahead of its scheduled premiere, amid protests saying that the one-hour special would reinforce stereotypes about black men. ColorOfChange.org had collected more than 40,000 signatures for an online petition to have the show shelved.
  • There's going to be more tiger blood in this world, as Charlie Sheen announced he is going to be a grandfather while appearing on “The Late Show with David Letterman.” Sheen's oldest daughter, Cassandra Estevez, is pregnant with her first child. “Me as a grandfather, Dave… I don’t know,” said Sheen, joking, “It’s like the world’s going to crack in half.” He added, “It’s fabulous. It’s just not a title I’m ready to adopt.”
  • The BBC reportedly contributes $13.3 BILLION to the U.K. economy -- up 4 percent from the previous two-year period, according to a report ordered by the British public broadcaster. It concluded that the BBC gave back nearly twice the amount it gets from an annual license fee from U.K. taxpayers.
  • "Hot Tub Time Machine" is getting a sequel, the only question is whether John Cusack will return for a second dip in the pool.
  • "The Killing" has been resurrected from the deadAMC and Fox Television Studios made it official after they announced the show will be back on AMC, not on Netflix as expected.
  • Town & Country magazine has named Prince Harry the "Most Eligible Bachelor" of 2013. Prince Harry, 28, beat out 39 famous faces, including George Clooney, for the honor. "He's the wild-card royal, the naughty one, the one who goes out with rah women, hangs out with a fast crowd, downs too many drinks, and goes home at the wrong moment. That's why we all like him best,"Town & Country says of their top choice.

Watch Simpson talk about her new show, as well as her surprise second pregnancy getting in the way of her wedding:

SEE ALSO: 'Star Wars' delivered a brilliant response to the White House's Death Star rejection >

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Ryan Gosling Turned Down The Chance To Be A Backstreet Boy

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Ryan Gosling Backstreet Boys

Ryan Gosling may be a bankable leading man and Oscar nominee, but he could have had a very different fate.

Back when the 32-year-old actor was a young kid singing and dancing in the Mickey Mouse Club, Backstreet Boy A.J. McLean approached Gosling about joining his boy band.

"When I was doing the 'Mickey Mouse Club,' we were living in the same place. He was saying how big they were going to be," Gosling explained to Celebuzz of McLean. "And he had a poster of them in his house …We were like, it's never going to happen."

'"Didn't they already do that with New Kids [On the Block]? You're a little late," Gosling says he thought at the time. "Cut to... I was wrong."

The Backstreet Boys went on to become the best-selling boy band of all time, selling over 130 million records worldwide.

Gosling, meanwhile, has since earned an Oscar nomination for his role in 2007's "Half Nelson," starred in a string of box office hits such as "Drive" and "The Ides of March," and currently stars in "Gangster Squad."

As for his missed shot at a spot in a famous boy band, Gosling joked to Celebuzz, "I can't live in the past. I've got to live in the now. That ship has sailed."

Meanwhile McLean spoke out to apologize for his ungentlemanly behavior, going so far as to offer the actor a role as a member of the group.

Explaining he does not have Ryan's number, he said: "I am so sorry I didn't call you back, dude. If we ever want a sixth Backstreet Boy, I'm going to call you."

When McLean does call, we know Gosling will be ready.

Check out his moves from 1991 when he was just an 11-year-old in drop-crotch pants and a silk shirt lip-syncing and break dancing in a Mormon talent show alongside his sister.

SEE ALSO:

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'Zero Dark Thirty' Director Kathryn Bigelow Offers Sobering Statement On Torture

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Zero Dark Thirty

Kathryn Bigelow took to the LA Times this morning not to make a case for or against "torture," but to highlight the fact that the movie helps us to remember that it did actually happened.

From the LA Times:

Torture was, however, as we all know, employed in the early years of the hunt. That doesn't mean it was the key to finding Bin Laden. It means it is a part of the story we couldn't ignore. War, obviously, isn't pretty, and we were not interested in portraying this military action as free of moral consequences. 

Some interpretations of Bigelow's film 'Zero Dark Thirty' assert that it endorses the practice of torture and misrepresents the role it played — one might remember a certain captive in the film pleading not to be tortured anymore, then providing key information.

Bigelow does note rightly that in the ongoing analysis of the effectiveness of torture "experts disagree sharply on the facts and particulars of the intelligence hunt, and doubtlessly that debate will continue." The controvertible history of torture has remained a sobering detail of the global war on terror.

Still, Bigelow's letter avoids giving an opinion on the morality of torture. About as close as it gets is to say:

This is an important principle to stand up for, and it bears repeating. For confusing depiction with endorsement is the first step toward chilling any American artist's ability and right to shine a light on dark deeds, especially when those deeds are cloaked in layers of secrecy and government obfuscation.

SEE ALSO: The 25 most effective weapons in the U.S. arsenal >

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UPDATED: Everything We Know About The Super Bowl Ad Lineup So Far

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Tim Tebow didn't want picture with Kate Upton, Chrissy Teigen

As the countdown begins for Super Bowl XLVII, it's time to focus on one of the most important parts of the game: The ads.

We're updating this post daily as news comes in, so keep checking back.

We might not know what teams are playing yet, but this is one of the most watched television events in the world, so there's already a pretty solid advertiser lineup.

These are the companies that shelled out $3.8 million for each 30-second time slot that will play to 111 million people.

From Kate Upton for Mercedes to Skechers famous French bull Mr. Quiggly, here's what you have to look forward to.

If you have any Super Bowl ad updates, email LStampler@businessinsider.com.

Anheuser-Busch InBev

The Budweiser parent company has a lot planned as the Super Bowl's exclusive beer advertiser.

A-B bought four and a half minutes of ad space — including the first commercial that will be seen in the entire game. Anomaly created two 30-second spots called "Coronation" and "Celebration" for A-B's newest, more alcoholic than average beer: Black Crown. See a photo from the ad here.

Translation made the next two 60-second spots for Bud Light, inspired by the Superstitions campaign from earlier this football season.

Then there will be a 30-second spot for Beck's Sapphire and a 60-second spot starring the Clydesdale horses.

A-B's VP of Marketing hinted to BI that there might be celebrities, but he didn't confirm or say who it would be. While previous outlets reported that Jay-Z would be making and starring in a spot, A-B told BI that that's not the case. Womp womp.



Audi of America (VW)

All we know so far is that Audi bought a 60-second commercial that will be made by agency Venables, Bell and Partners. The shop was also responsible for the car company's vampire-inspired spot last year. After the vampires were killed by the S7's LED headlights, the ad ended with the hashtag #SoLongVampires. So expect a social component this year, too.



Axe (Unilever)

Axe is another newcomer to the Super Bowl this year. BBH London will create a spot called "Lifeguard" that touts its newest — and strangest — endeavor: Axe is sending 22 regular people into outer space.

Although Axe has relied heavily on risqueé ads in which women jump men after one spritz of body spray, it has recently produced more complex work. It got attention for a spot in which Keifer Sutherland laments the one that got away (screenshot of ad on right). The press release reminds fans to follow Axe on Facebook and Twitter for more updates.



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Twitter Unveils 'Oscars Index' To Track Awards Buzz By User Sentiment

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Oscar Index Anne Hathaway Jennifer LawrenceOn Tuesday, Twitter introduced a website that will track what people are tweeting about this year's Oscar nomineesand could forever change how we predict award show winners.

Twitter Oscars Index is a line graph in which you can check out how popular nominated films, actors, and directors are based on the positive feedback they receive in tweets.

The Index rates positive tweets on a scale from 0-100. Twitter detailed how this works on its blog"For example, if a nominee has an Index of 80, comments about that nominee are more positive than roughly 80 percent of all the other terms on Twitter."

The unique system gives a daily tweet analysis on all big Oscar categories from Best Picture to Best Director. 

Here's a look at Best Picture:

Twitter Oscar Index

Users can track a film, director, or actor's popularity on Twitter from Dec. 16 until the current date to see how favorites pair up against each other and see Twitter's predictions for the Oscar race.

For example, both "Argo" and "Django Unchained" have seen major improvements in score since Christmas, while "Amour" has stayed rather neutral (other than a spike on Jan. 10, probably due to its Oscar nominations). "Zero Dark Thirty" is far below every other nominee with a score of six (it has ranged anywhere from three to seven and a half).

Who does Twitter pick to win the big categories?

Best Picture: "Silver Linings Playbook." 
Best Actor: Hugh Jackman just beats out Daniel Day-Lewis today. Both have been received tremendously on Twitter.
Best Actress: Jennifer Lawrence has been leading the pack since day one; however, Jessica Chastain has also been gaining traction.
Supporting Actor: Christoph Waltz.
Supporting Actress: Sally Field pulls ahead of Anne Hathaway.
Best Director: Ang Lee, hands down. 

The move comes after Twitter saw over four million tweets about the Golden Globes on Sunday, kicking off awards seasonwhich also includes the Critic's Choice, Screen Actor's Guild, Director's Guild, Writer's Guild, Producer's Guild, British Academy of Film and TV, and Academy Awards.

For the first time in history, the index "reflects the ebb and flow" of award season chatter, "showing how positively fans on Twitter are discussing nominees relative to each other," Fred Graver, Twitter's head of TV, wrote on the microblogging service's official blog.

Twitter first rolled out a similar product last year during the 2012 election to track how Twitter users felt about social and economic issues and, most importantly, about candidates Mitt Romney and Barack Obama. 

The Oscar Index was produced in partnership with social-analytics provider Topsy, the same company that created Twitter's Political Index during November's election. 

We'll see on February 24 if the Academy feels the same way as the fans.

SEE ALSO: Roadmap To The Future

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17 Surprising Things Mark Zuckerberg 'Likes'

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Taylor SwiftFacebook just launched a new search tool called Graph Search.

Graph Search isn't widely available yet. But once it's implemented, it will surf each Facebook user's profile for their "likes." Then it will show them in relevant search results to friends and friends of friends. 

Now would be a good time to clean out your "like" pages on Facebook if you don't want to start showing up often on Graph Search.

But in the meantime, we stalked Mark Zuckerberg's Facebook profile for things that interest him.

It turns out he favors quite a few things, from Taylor Swift to a baby walrus.

Here's what Mark Zuckerberg "likes," that many people will soon be able to search. 

Mark Zuckerberg enjoys a good Shakira track. He's also a fan of John Mayer, Green Day and Daft Punk.



Of course, Zuck is also a Taylor Swift fan.



He enjoys McDonald's Chicken McNuggets. He hasn't revealed his sauce preference.



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Model Coco Rocha's 'Insane' List Of Things She Won't Do Because She's A Jehova's Witness

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Coco Rocha Model

Model Coco Rocha has 1.8 million contacts on Google Plus, nearly a half million Twitter followers, and 299,258 Instagram followers, but very few know of the high profile model's devout religious beliefs.

“My faith is everything,” Rocha, 24, declares in the new issue of Du Jour magazine about being a lifelong Jehova's Witness.

“There aren’t many Witnesses who are in the public eye. I can’t even name any,” laments Rocha, "It’s hard sometimes when you’re there alone. You’re not there with someone who can hold your hand and say we’ll do this together.”

One person who will hold the model's hand is her husband who manages her career -- and is also a Jehova's Witness.

Together, the two go door to door with their congregation on a weekly basis to educate people about their faith.

"Some people think we’re a pushy religion, but if you’re not interested, just say so," says Rocha

Rocha has been a Jehovah’s Witness her entire life, but she wasn’t baptized until 2009 at the age of 21. (The religion requires that followers be old enough to make their own decisions before fully committing.)

Once committed, Rocha changed her modeling contract to include many new clauses listing things she was no longer comfortable with, such as nudity, lingerie and sheer clothing, among other things.

“My list [of what I won’t do] compared with any other model’s is insane," Rocha explains. "No religious artifacts, no government artifacts. If I’m shooting with a male model, what is he exactly doing with me? What is he wearing? If I’m working with other models, what are they wearing? Are they playing something that I don’t want?” 

“In the beginning, the clients would say, ‘This is too much,’ but over time, the ones I liked kept working with me. They’d say, ‘It’s not too much. Coco can still be Coco. She still gives 100 percent when she’s on a photo shoot.’ It’s just my boobs aren’t out. And I don’t have a cigarette in my hand, and I’m not making out with a guy. And it’s all fine if you want to do that. I don’t judge. My besties do Victoria’s Secret. I just don’t do it.”

But apparently dancing is still A-OK. Check out Rocha in the below commercial for White House Black Market clothing chain:

SEE ALSO: Here's what Kate Middleton & Prince William are looking for in a new servant >

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Obama Calls For Research Into Impact Of Violent Videogames — But Not Movies Or TV

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barack obama joe biden

President Barack Obama wants the federal government to fund research to look at the impact of violent videogames.

At a press conference Wednesday detailing his proposals for tighter gun laws, the president said that the scientific community needs to discover if there is a link between gory entertainment and the recent spate of mass-shootings.

He did not, however, make any mention of violence in the movies or on TV. 

"We don’t benefit from ignorance," Obama said. "We don’t benefit from not knowing the science of this epidemic of violence."

The president has been pushing for more restrictions on gun ownership in the wake of the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary in Newtown, Conn., last month that left more than 20 people dead.

Obama said that he is instructing the Center for Disease Control to study the roots of violent behavior, and is asking Congress for $10 million to fund the research.

The film industry must be relieved not to have been targeted in the president's remarks and their omission could prevent a big dust-up. Hollywood executives and Motion Picture Association of American Chairman Chris Dodd havesaid they will hit back on any efforts to restrict violence in movies.

Members of the movie and television industry briefed Vice President Joe Biden and other members of the president's task-force on gun violence at the White House last week about content ratings systems, which  give parents tools to regulate what kind of TV programming and movies their children watch.

Dodd, the National Association of Broadcaster's CEO Gordon Smith and National Cable Telecommunications Association CEO Michael Powell were among the industry figures present.

In addition to scientific research into gun violence, Obama is calling for a ban on assault weapons and high-capacity ammunition magazines and universal background checks for gun buyers.

"When it comes to protecting the most vulnerable among us, we must act now, Obama said.

In addition to the killings in Newtown, Obama also cited the shootings at an Aurora, Colo., screening of "The Dark Knight Rises" last July that left 12 people dead as more evidence that there need to be more limits on what types of guns can be purchased by civilians.

"Weapons designed for war have no place in a movie theater," Obama said.

The National Rifle Association has already begun a television campaign against Obama's proposals, but the lobbying group may be more sympathetic research into media companies' role in inciting violence.

At a press conference last month on the Newtown massacre, NRA CEO Wayne LaPierre said the blame for these killings rested on "blood-soaked" films like "American Psycho" and violent games like "Grand Theft Auto."

"There exists in this country a callous, corrupt and corrupting shadow industry that sells, and sows, violence against its own people," LaPierre said.

"Isn’t fantasizing about killing people as a way to get your kicks really the filthiest form of pornography?" he asked later.

At the end of the session, they released a generic statement of support for trying to reduce violence.

"This industry has a longstanding commitment to provide parents the tools necessary to make the right viewing decisions for their families," the group said. "We welcome the opportunity to share that history and look forward to doing our part to seek meaningful solutions.”

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Here's Why Everyone Is Freaking Out About The Big Scientology Book Coming Out Tomorrow

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Church of Scientology

Lawrence Wright's long look at Scientology, "Going Clear: Scientology, Hollywood & the Prison of Belief," is set for release tomorrow, and reviews, for the most part, have been overwhelmingly positive. But why? Wright's is only the latest high-profile investigation into the underbelly of Scientology, following big heaves by St. Petersburg (now Tampa Bay) Times and Janet Reitman's landmark book, "Inside Scientology." While those who have read Wright's effort already have not reported any bombshell revelations, they are full of raves. How does it stand out? Well, here's what critics have to say: 

Wright Puts Scientology in the Context of American Religious Belief

Though he provides biting anecdotes and damning allegations Wright is not dismissive of Scientology. Troy Jollimore at the Chicago Tribune explains how the book's "most intriguing aspect" is how Wright raises "general questions about the nature of faith and reason and the role of religion in American life." Wright makes the case that it's hard to write it off as illegitimate, that "Scientology's methods of establishing its claims are in principle no better, but also no worse, than those of any other religion." Jollimore explains how the "prison of belief" that factors into Wright's subtitle has a place in every religion. But that general point does not take away how Scientology's particular "prison of belief" can be horrifying. Take this example Jollimore provides:  

In one striking example, Hollywood composer Mark Isham, who worked with [Paul] Haggis before the latter's apostasy, justified his refusal to read newspaper articles critical of the church by stating that in his view, "it was like reading Mein Kampf if you wanted to know something about the Jewish religion."

But the book makes the case that the scariest part of Scientology is that it shares "the resistance to criticism and objective evidence" with other religions. Wright writes all of this in what James Kirchick of the Daily Beast describes as a "measured tone." Per Kirchick, Wright uses "a scalpel instead of a hammer to dissect Scientology and its manifold abuses, which renders his conclusions all the more damning." That said, Janet Maslin in The New York Times makes the case that for all of this Wright isn't quite able to crack Scientology's mysteries.

Wright's Impressive, Immersive Reporting

Paul Elie at The Wall Street Journal explains that while there are a lot of shocking details—one that has been passed around includes a Scientology executive being forced to clean a bathroom with his tongue—it's the sheer detail of Wright's reporting that makes it stand out. Elie explains that the "power" of the book is "in our awed recognition that Mr. Wright spent years of his life on this story—that he interviewed dozens of odd or compromised or fearful people, assembled the intricate edifice of Scientology's beliefs, mapped the territory of its empire, and traced its ill effects, even though the organization and its people aren't particularly interesting." That said, Kirchick notes that those "revelations" that Wright provides will "come as news even to hardened Scientology buffs who follow the Church’s every twist and turn." The details he gets are peppered by the, almost humorous in their multitude, denials from lawyers. 

One caveat to all the in-depth reporting: It is not always easy reading. Elie writes that "'Going Clear' is sometimes hard going on account of its subject matter. But it is an utterly necessary story even so." Publisher's Weekly explains that the detail is "persuasive, albeit sometimes mind-numbing." 

That Said, The Anecdotes Are Amazing

Evan Wright at the Los Angeles Times calls the anecdotes "insane."  We got a taste of what the book might have to offer in the two excerpts from The Hollywood Reporter, one went in depth on how Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman's relationship was characterized by Scientology, the other tells the horrifying story of John Travolta's liaison to the church, Sylvia "Spanky" Taylor, who was sent to the church's prison-like disciplinary program the Rehabilitation Project Force. While Tony Ortega, formerly editor of the Village Voice, wrote on his website where he follows Scientology: "Spanky’s story is great, and in part for the reason that Tikk (Manhattan lawyer Scott Pilutik) pointed out in the comments—it shows that John Travolta was aware that members were being 'rehabilitated' in labor camps." The Daily Beast has a list of what it calls the fifteen "most startling revelations" this morning, such as the story of Hubbard's second marriage to a 21-year-old woman named Sara. "When Sara wanted to leave him," The Daily Beast's summary reads, "Hubbard and a man who might have carried a gun abducted their baby daughter, Alexis. Then they kidnapped Sara. He told her that if she tried to leave him, he’d kill Alexis, then later claimed he had killed the baby already—'cut her into little pieces and dropped the pieces in a river.'"

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Legendary NYC Nightclub Marquee Is Back — And It Already Hosted The 'Wolf Of Wall Street' Wrap Party

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After a yearlong, multi-million-dollar renovation, the red velvet ropes will once again hold back the lines outside famed New York City nightclub Marquee.

The West Chelsea hotspot is scheduled to open to the public Friday with a performance by techno DJ Dubfire.

The revamped space will be better-equipped for A-list DJs and musical acts, with fewer tables and a bigger dance floor. And designer Josh Held gave it an industrial-style makeover, covering the walls in recycled leather belts and using welded rebar for the handrails.

Marquee officially opens this weekend, but guests at the wrap party for Martin Scorsese's "The Wolf of Wall Street" got a sneak peek when they partied there Saturday.

Check out some pictures of the party and the new space below:

marquee nyc

 

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marquee nyc

SEE ALSO: Inside The Massive Las Vegas Nightclub That Earned $80 Million Last Year

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HOUSE OF THE DAY: David Duchovny and Tea Leoni List Their Upper East Side Triplex For $9.25 Million

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170 East 78th Street Duchovny

Despite the couple's split back in 2011, David Duchovny and Tea Leoni's triplex maisonette has been sitting untouched on the Upper East Side — until now.

The property was just listed by Stribling & Associates for $9.25 million, according to a Curbed NY report. Though public records reportedly name the seller as "Salvator Trust," Curbed cites an old blog post by Big Time Listings from 2009 that says the now-separated couple are the owners of the unit, which they bought in April 2008 for $6.25 million.

The 170 East 78th Street address was originally three separate artists' studios that were combined into the five-bedroom townhouse that's currently on the market. The pre-war building comes complete with a doorman and garden. It's even pet friendly.

Originally three separate artists' lofts, the triplex is made up of 12 rooms with 13-foot ceilings.

Source: Stribling & Associates



The living room and family rooms all have wood-burning fireplaces.

Source: Stribling & Associates



The master bedroom has two huge floor-to-ceiling windows to let in natural light.

Source: Stribling & Associates



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Honey Boo Boo's 'Uncle Poodle' Reveals He's HIV-Positive

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Honey Boo Boo Uncle PoodleLee Thompson, Alana's beloved "Uncle Poodle" on TLC's "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo," has just revealed he is HIV-positive.

"I knew it had been my boyfriend who infected me," Thompson says in a new interview with Fenuxe magazine, whose tagline is "Modern, American, Gay." 

"I later learned he had been HIV positive and was not taking medication and had not bothered to tell me about it," Thompson continued. "I was advised that I should press charges and, hesitantly, I did. It was the right thing to do."

Thompson's ex-boyfriend is now serving a five-year sentence for not disclosing his condition.

Honey Boo Boo Uncle Poodle

"On March 16, 2012, I tested negative. Then, in May of 2012 my test results came back positive," Thompson explained in the article. "I would have been cool with his HIV status if he had been honest. I don’t have an issue with the disease. I would have known how to protect myself."

TLC has so far not commented on Thompson's revelation, but the hit "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo" -- on which Thompson was a recurring character -- has been picked up for a second season.

As for where that "Uncle Poodle" nickname came from, he says, "Alana. She calls all gay men 'my poodles' and I am her Uncle Poodle."

In a season one episode of of the hit TLC show, Alana says of her beloved uncle, "Ain't nothing wrong with being gay. Everyone's a little gay."

Uncle Poodle says he decided to tell his story because "I want to have my own television show and highlight what it is like being gay in the south ... I think I have a good story to tell." 

Watch the Thompson family address their Uncle Poodle's sexuality below:

SEE ALSO: Why Mama June put her kids' "Honey Boo Boo" earnings into trust funds >

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Happy 91st Birthday Betty White! 15 Things You Didn't Know About America's 'Golden Girl'

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betty white birthday

Our favorite "Golden Girl" turns 91 today!

Is there anything Betty White hasn’t done?

She's been television royalty from the early days of radio, to the quiz show era, and "Golden Girls."

In the past few years, she’s had cameos on everything from “Community” to “30 Rock” and “The Middle,” has brought in record ratings on "Saturday Night Live" and made a television comeback on TV Land's “Hot in Cleveland."

Currently, White has a hit comedy "Off Their Rockers" on NBC where she's danced Gangnam Style with PSY.

However, you probably don't know everything about the Queen of Comedy. 

We went through LIFE's illustrated biography of Betty White to find out what you don't know about the woman behind the laughs.

White nearly left the biz before making it big, wasn't proud of all her television roles, and nearly wasn't on the "Mary Tyler Moore Show."

Betty's first work in Hollywood was in a Parkay margarine commercial.

White hung around in producer Fran Van Hartesveldt office until he decided to offer her a job in the commercial

This led to her appearance on radio show "The Great Gildersleeve," also headed by Hartesveldt.

(Betty White: The Illustrated Biography)



White has never had acting lessons.

White has said they were never her thing.

"I just want to bring as much natural as I can," said White. "I'm not saying that people who take acting lessons are false. They're much better than I am, but it doesn't work for me."

(Betty White: The Illustrated Biography)



1949: White may have never appeared alongside Al Jarvis on "Hollywood on Television" – and later became host in 1952 – if she passed up an unpaid gig.

Before joining "Hollywood on Television," White was asked if she'd be interested in a television special with then-radio disc jockey, Dick Haynes. The free gig led to a call from Jarvis – another disc jockey – to have Betty as his sidekick on "Hollywood on Television."

(Betty White: The Illustrated Biography)



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How Low Could Apple Go?

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tim cook

Apple's stock is now down about 30% from its high.

This plunge has led to a feisty argument between the Apple perma-fans, who dismiss the fall as "stock manipulation," and other investors, who think that several fundamental trends that have made Apple the most valuable company in the world have started to change.

After defending the stock for the first few months of its swoon, meanwhile, Wall Street analysts are now rushing to cut price targets and downgrade it.

So, who's right?

And how bad could it get?

Specifically, if those who believe Apple's fortunes are changing are right, how low could the stock go? And might Apple's stock just suddenly prove the doubters wrong and blast off to the stratosphere again?

Let's address the broader question first.

Sorry, But It's Not Just "Stock Manipulation"

I'm sorry to disappoint diehard Apple fans, but it is the height of reality distortion to believe that a 30% fall in the stock of the world's most valuable company is just "stock manipulation."

No one has the power to "manipulate" Apple's stock to that extent. Apple is one of the most liquid stocks in the world. The folks who trade millions of shares of Apple stock every day are a highly diverse group of investors. Bad information can temporarily move stocks, yes, but the market is very good at sorting out whether new information is bad information or weak information and discounting it accordingly. So if, say, last week's report that Apple had cut its iPhone orders in half was, in fact, inaccurate, the market has long since factored that possibility into the stock price.

Just because the market for Apple stock is liquid, of course, doesn't mean that Apple's stock price is "right."

The market gets it wrong all the time.

But, importantly, the reason the market gets it wrong all the time is that stock prices are based on what people think will happen in the future, not what has happened in the past. And no one knows what will happen in the future.

In case you haven't completely internalized that last paragraph, here it is again:

Stock prices represent a collective guess about what will happen in the future. And no one knows what will happen in the future.

The upshot of that is that Apple's changing stock price is all about what the consensus thinks will happen to Apple's fortunes and finances over the next few years.

And here, it seems clear, there are signs that several key fundamental trends that have driven Apple's stock for the past decade are changing.

I've described these trends in detail here and here.

Here's a summary:

  • The market for "premium" smartphones is maturing, and Apple does not offer a low-priced smartphone for emerging markets--which is where the explosive growth is. Thus, Apple's growth will likely slow.
  • Apple's competition has caught up in smartphones and is catching up in tablets (especially lower-priced tablets). Apple no longer has the market to itself.
  • Apple's extraordinary profit margin will almost certainly decline as Apple sells more lower-margin tablets and, possibly, introduces a low-priced smartphone.
  • The TV business, which Apple is expected to enter, is a brutally competitive low-margin business, and Apple's chances of revolutionizing this business seem low.
  • Recent management changes illustrate that the Steve Jobs era really is finally over, and the new regime has not yet demonstrated that it will be able to produce the same Jobs-ian magic.

It's hard to imagine how a reasonable person could look at those trends and conclude that nothing has changed.

So it's not surprising that Apple's price-earnings "multiple" is compressing. That's what happens when fundamental trends start to deteriorate.

With Apple now at $500, the key question is, what's next?

Will Apple bounce right back and soar to the $1,000+ level that just about everyone was saying was a slam dunk four months ago?

Or will Apple keep falling? And, if so, how low will it go?

Well, importantly, no one knows. So don't hallucinate that there's some guru somewhere who can tell you.

For what it's worth, here are my thoughts on this:

Call me crazy, but I actually don't think Apple stock is going to collapse much further from here, at least not soon. The stock might drop to $400 or something--that would be normal volatility--but I don't see it crashing to say, $200, unless something radically changes.

Meanwhile, I think there's a good chance that Apple will continue to grow over the next few years, albeit at a slower pace than it has grown over the past few years. And this, I would guess, would leave the stock trading in a range of about $400-$700 for a few years.

Specifically, fundamentally, I think the following things will happen over the next few years:

  • Apple's revenue growth will slow
  • Apple will be forced to offer a low-price smartphone
  • Apple will be forced to offer lower-priced tablets
  • Apple will launch other new products but none will be world-changing mega-profit hits like the iPhone
  • Apple's profit margin, which is currently an absolutely astounding 26%, will decline
  • Apple's earnings growth will slow or even decline as Apple's profit margin drops
  • Apple will continue to be an excellent and healthy company

The most important theory here from a stock perspective is the belief that Apple's earnings growth will slow, stop, or even decline.

This theory is based on the following assumptions:

  • Apple's revenue will grow, but
  • Apple's profit margin will decline

Let's put some numbers on that.

In the last fiscal year, Apple generated $157 billion of revenue and $42 billion of profit (26% profit margin).

Let's say that, in a couple of years, Apple's revenue grows to $250 billion, but its profit margin declines to 20%. In that scenario, Apple would earn $50 billion in a couple of years. That would be nice earnings growth, but it would be a major slowdown over the last few years.

More optimistically, we could say that Apple's revenue might grow to $250 billion but that the company could somehow maintains its profit margin. Then the company would earn $65 billion in a couple of years. That's a lot more than $50 billion.

More pessimistically, we could say that Apple's run as the smartphone and tablet champ really is over and that Apple will fail to introduce cool new products and a low-priced smartphone and that its revenue will only grow to $200 billion (or less) and its profit margin will shrink to 20% (or less). This would produce only $40 billion of profit--less than the company is earning now.

All of those scenarios, in my opinion, are reasonable. I don't know which will actually happen. But I think the most likely scenario is the first one I laid out... revenue deceleration and margin declines, all of which will lead to stock multiple compression.

The good news is that Apple's stock multiple has already compressed. The stock is now trading at 11-times trailing earnings.

That is just not a high price for a company of this quality and promise.

It's not a screamingly cheap price, either--plenty of companies trade for a lot lower than that--but it's not expensive.

But it's a price that suggests that, unless something terrible happens, the stock probably won't completely collapse from here.

Of course, there's always the chance that something terrible will happen.

The Armageddon Scenario

One thing that's important to remember when you're thinking about a company and stock like Apple is that amazing stock stories don't go from great to awful overnight.

The stories about massive "must-own" stocks that make investors a fortune over many years, only to then collapse and lose almost all of their value over the following several years, are legion.

In hindsight, these "round trips" seem obvious:

When the stock hit its peak, the 20-20 hindsight goes, any fool could have seen that it was going to completely collapse.

The reality, not surprisingly, is different.

A light doesn't suddenly just change from green to red.

Rather, something small changes, and the stock drops a bit. At first, everyone regards the drop as a "buying opportunity," just like all of the temporary drops of the past several years. Then something else changes, and the stock drops some more. This time, some people start to observe that something has changed. But most people still regard the fall as a buying opportunity. Then more things start to go wrong, and the stock drops some more. Now, everyone knows that things have changed, but the stock price has also dropped, so it doesn't seem to make sense to sell at the lower price--better to wait until the stock comes back a bit. Then more things go wrong. And the stock falls some more. And so on. Eventually, years after the peak, the company is a mess, and the stock is flat on its back, and everyone who didn't sell feels like an absolutely moron. But, importantly, at every step along the way, the stock was trading at a level that likely seemed reasonable relatively to a reasonable range of scenarios about the future. So the mistakes really are only obvious in hindsight.

I made that mistake with Yahoo in the 1990s. I thought that Yahoo would be one of the long-term dotcom winners--a must-own stock for the digital generation.

I was willing to accept a lot of volatility, because I was a long term investor.

So when Yahoo first collapsed, I didn't really mind.

But then, over the years, the industry changed, and Yahoo fell farther and farther behind.

Now, 15 years later, I own a $20 stock that once traded as high as $108. And I feel like a moron.

(True, it could have been much worse. Yahoo could be a $0 stock).

Of course, lest you think the moral of that story is "sell at the first sign of trouble!", I also thought that Amazon would be one of the big winners of the digital generation. So I bought and held that stock. Like Yahoo, when the dotcom bubble burst, Amazon collapsed. But, unlike Yahoo, Amazon eventually came back--and then some. My Amazon perseverance, in other words, has paid off--I have gotten a perfectly good return on my investment. My Yahoo perseverance, meanwhile, cost me my shirt.

So, the truth is you just never know.

And the point about Apple is this:

It may be that the new Apple will be just as astounding a company as the old Apple--that all the Apple doubters will soon be shamed and the stock will blast off to the moon again. That's certainly possible.

And it's possible that Apple will go through a multi-year period of "consolidation," in which the stock trades sideways in a big trading range. Google did that for years. Amazon did that for years. Microsoft has done that for 12 years. All of those stocks were "must-own" story stocks in their day. It happens all the time.

But it's also possible, I am sorry to say, that Apple is in the first stages of a Yahoo-like decline.

When Apple collapsed the first time, you will recall, back in the 1990s, Apple didn't go from "top of the world" to near bankruptcy overnight. The collapse took years. It included the hiring of John Sculley. Then the firing of Steve Jobs. Then the firing of John Sculley and the hiring of Gil Amelio. And a bunch of dud products. In other words, it was a long, gradual decline.

The same thing could be happening to Apple right now.

I don't think that will happen. I hope that doesn't happen. But to argue that it can't happen would be to stuff your head in the sand.

Apple's markets are changing. Apple's management is changing.  Apple's products are changing, Apple's culture is changing.

No one knows for sure yet where those changes will lead.

But for the must-own "story stock" of past decade, the next few years are going to be interesting.

SEE ALSO: It's Official: Apple Has Lost Its Edge

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This Ad Featuring Mila Kunis Had Just Been Banned In Britain

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mila kunis rodial

This ad for Rodial skin cream (click to enlarge), featuring an image of Mila Kunis from an Esquire magazine photo shoot, has been banned in the U.K.

The Advertising Standards Authority, the British regulator of ads, ordered that the ad never appear again after a complaint that it was misleading.

The ASA said "evidence was not presented to demonstrate the implied efficacy claims for the product or that Mila Kunis had achieved the look featured in the photo as a result of using the product, we concluded that the ad was misleading."

The ad said, "Get a body to die for with 50% off body sculpture for 24 hours ... Get Mila Kunis' Esquire look with this intensive formula that helps reduce the appearance of cellulite fast."

It's not clear whether the image was used with Kunis' permission.

SEE ALSO: SEX, LIES, AND PHOTOSHOP: These Ads Were All Banned In 2012

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3 Las Vegas Hotels In $100M Bidding War Over Britney Spears — Here's Today's Buzz

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Britney Spears Rihanna

 

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Victoria's Secret Angel Karlie Kloss Announces Plan To Go To Harvard

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karlie kloss victoria's secret

Victoria's Secret model Karlie Kloss is one of the most prolific models of the year. 

She walked in the lingerie company's fashion show, hosted her very own MTV show and fronted campaigns for Mercedes and Juicy Couture. 

But 20-year-old Kloss has announced her aspirations don't end there. 

“[Going to] Harvard at some point is in the plan, but all in good time,” Kloss told The Daily

She wants to study medicine or business. 

“I have always had an interest in medicine; my father is an emergency room doctor. Now that I am getting more and more involved in these entrepreneurial projects I think business is something that would also be fascinating. To have a better understanding of economics and business and the way to run a successful company.”

Kloss also said that she was inspired by former Victoria's Secret Angel Tyra Banks. 

“Tyra [Banks] did it. She went to Harvard business school. I can do it, too," Kloss explained. 

In the mean time, perhaps Kloss' tech investor boyfriend can give her business tips. 

DON'T MISS: The Most Outrageous Victoria's Secret Fashion Show Ever >

Watch below, Kloss' boyfriend Josh Kushner talk about his time at Harvard and whether going to grad school is helpful to entrepreneurs. (We interviewed Kushner on the subject back in 2010.)

 

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Rihanna's Tips For Taking The Perfect Instagram Selfie (FB)

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rihanna selfiePop superstar Rihanna knows a thing or two about taking a great photo. Her Instagram account, badgalriri is filled with photos she has taken of herself, better known as "selfies."

Rihanna sat down with Complex Magazine for a cover story interview where she revealed tips on taking the perfect Instagram photo.

Here's what she said:

Get a good light...get a good angle on what's working for you that day.

...

If it's boobs, make sure you hit that. If it's face, make sure it's fierce.

Rihanna's Instagram account hasn't even been around for a year but that hasn't stopped her from taking over 230 selfies.

Check out the complete interview on Complex>

See Also: Facebook Isn't Cool Anymore (And That's What It Has To Fix Today) >

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'Iron Man' Will Be Wielding Chinese Gadgets Thanks To Huge New Product Placement Deal

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iron man 3 bunnyWile E. Coyote has ACME and billionaire Tony Stark will have TCL. 

Don't recognize the name? You may soon. Or, at least that's what the Chinese electronics company hopes.  

The Creative Life (TCL) which recently bought the rights to Grauman's Chinese Theater for $5 million– (yes, it will be renamed the TCL Theater) – has announced a product placement deal to appear in the upcoming "Iron Man 3."

Everything from Tony Stark's motion panel device to his smart TV and mobile handsets will be from the Chinese company. 

Chaimain and co-founder Tomson Li told Bloomberg News at CES in Las Vegas last week their plan is to compete with big dogs, Apple and Samsung.

“I believe our new generation of products are as good as those from Samsung and Apple,” said Li. “This Iron Man cooperation is very useful for us to promote the TCL brand in the global market, including the U.S. and China.”

This isn't the first brand placement for the company though. According to TCL, they've also done previous promotions with "Transformers: Dark of the Moon," "The Avengers," "The Dark Knight Rises," and "Cloud Atlas."

"Iron Man 3" hits theaters May 3.

SEE ALSO: Three Vegas hotels are in a $100M bidding war over Britney Spears >

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