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Jackie Chan Investigated For Taking On Triad Gang With 'Guns And Grenades'

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Jackie Chan

Hong Kong police said they will investigate comments made by action star Jackie Chan that he had used guns and grenades to confront triad gang members.

The Rush Hour star told the Guangzhou-based Southern People Weekly magazine that he had been "bullied" by triads, or the Chinese organised crime societies, that were once powerful and thrived in the Asian financial hub.

"In the past, when they bullied me. I hid in the United States. They opened fire at me once I got off the aeroplane," Hong Kong's South China Morning Post quoted him as saying in the magazine interview published last week.

"From that moment on, I needed to carry a gun every day when I went out," said the Hong Kong born star, who has played a hero cop that took on crime lords in his hugely popular Cantonese crime action film series Police Story.

The 58-year-old actor said he had to confront a gang of 20 members once with guns when the group surrounded him with knives at a Hong Kong eatery.

"I told them they had been going too far and that I had been hiding from them. Later on, I confronted them with two guns and six grenades," he said, without saying when the incident occurred or how it ended.

A police spokeswoman on Wednesday said they will probe Chan's comments but stopped short of saying whether they will question him.

"We will see what he has said in the interview first," the spokeswoman said.

Chan suggested in the same interview that protest in the semi-autonomous Hong Kong that was returned to Beijing in 1997 should be restricted, sparking criticism from activists and politicians.

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Time's Person Of The Year Is Barack Obama

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Time

Time has named President Barack Obama as Person of the Year.

The runners-up were 15-year-old Pakistani activist Malala Yousafzai, Apple CEO Tim Cook, Egyptian leader Mohamed Morsi, and Higgs boson physicist Fabiola Gianotti.

Here's the story by Michael Scherer of Time. 

It seems that re-election was a big part of the decision to choose Obama:

"It could be measured — in wars stopped and started; industries saved, restructured or reregulated; tax cuts extended; debt levels inflated; terrorists killed; the health-insurance system reimagined; and gay service members who could walk in uniform with their partners. It could be seen in the new faces who waited hours to vote and in the new ways campaigns are run. America debated and decided this year: history would not record Obama’s presidency as a fluke." ...

“You do understand that as President of the United States, the amount of power you have is overstated in some ways,” Obama says. “But what you do have the capacity to do is to set a direction.” He has earned the right to set that direction and has learned from experience how to move the country. After four of the most challenging years in the nation’s history, his chance to leave office as a great President who was able to face crises and build a new majority coalition remains within reach.

Obama received the honor in 2008 as well. Former president George W. Bush also won in his first year in office (2000) and after his re-election in 2004.

Now check out our list of The 20 Most Impressive People Of The Year

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Nutrition Group Wants Beyonce To Drop Her $50 Million Pepsi Deal [THE BRIEF]

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beyonce pepsi

Good morning, AdLand. Here's what you need to know today:

The Center for Science in the Public Interest wants Beyonce to turn her back on her $50 million deal with Pepsi because the sugary drink is associated with obesity, diabetes, and heart disease. And if she wants to keep her role as brand ambassador, the nutrition watchdog suggested she donates her proceeds to charity.

Video ads are coming to your Facebook news feed.

Here's why tech marketers are mourning the loss of Gossip Girl.

Check out the winners of the Young Guns 2012.

Bart Ingram joined brand eCommerce and digital marketing company Acquity Group. He will oversee the Creative Disciplines for the Chicago Studio. He previously served as the head of creative and experience design for the Southeast region at Razorfish.

Quria retail measurement service, appointed Jeff Griffin as EVP of sales and business development. He was previously at HookLogic.

Previously on Business Insider Advertising:

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Did Vogue Make A Photoshop Fail On Its Gwen Stefani January Cover?

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Photographer Annie Leibovitz shot the picture of singer Gwen Stefanie that graces Vogue's January issue.

But according to Photoshop Disasters something was lost in translation during the Photoshop process.

Can you spot the fail? Click here to see>gwen stefani vogue photoshop fail december

If you look at where the Vogue letters have been inserted, it seems like the hat was Photoshopped on after the fact, making her head seem smaller than it actually is. PS Disasters cites "the little matter of her teeny head and normal-sized face." Do you see the fail?

Click here for Photoshop Disasters>



There are more Photoshop fails where that came from.

Click here to see what Gucci did wrong>



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Angelina Jolie To Direct True WWII Drama 'Unbroken' — Here's Today's Buzz

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Angelina Jolie

SEE ALSO: The most buzzed-about YouTube videos this year >

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How A Quirky Violinist Is Using Social Media – And Tapping Gamer Culture – To Become An Unlikely YouTube Hit

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lindsey stirling violinist YouTube

PSY had to rap and dance like a horse to rack up millions of YouTube views.

Lindsey Stirling, meanwhile, plays the violin.

She also dances. Like some sprite from a magic kingdom – or a toy, wound up and let loose.

She can dance like PSY while playing the violin, too. More on that in a minute.

The quirky 26-year-old dancer, composer and musician has tapped social media to give herself a level of success that might otherwise seem improbable for a violinist. Thanks to her elaborate music videos that showcase her ability to blend everything from stomp to modern dance to strong beats, she’s racked up nearly 1.2 million subscribers to her YouTube channel. Her channel also has seen more than 190 million video views.

What sets her apart is the way she plays the heck out of a violin and blends that with her own compositions – plus her remixes that draw on her love of gaming.

She’s recently shot video performances, for example, of her own renditions of music from the popular Zelda, Just Dance, Skyrim and Assassin’s Creed video games.

Lindsey released her self-titled debut album in September, and she’s currently on tour.

Her success arguably would have been harder to come by without YouTube.

May we present exhibits A, B and C and D, collectively having garnered millions of views:

Just Dance:

Assassin’s Creed III:

Lord of the Rings: 

Zelda:

Combined, these four videos make up half of the views of her most popular video, Crystallize.

SEE ALSO: Up and coming models who's names you'll know in 2013 >

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The Name Of Shaquille O'Neal's New Vodka Brand Is Kind Of Amazing

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Shaq Genie Kazam

Shaquille O'Neal has been very busy lately — The New York Post is reporting that the former LA Lakers star, rapper, and leading man of Kazaam has teamed up with Devotion Vodka to make his very own liquor line called "Luv Shaq."

Shaq's vodka will come in a coconut flavor, and is both sugar- and gluten-free. And as if this story couldn't get better, the bottle will feature an image of O'Neal with giant wings on the label.

Shaquille isn't the only celebrity to get in on the vodka business. His liquor is reportedly in direct competition with Ciroc Vodka endorsed by Sean "Diddy" Combs but "at a more competitive price," according to The Post.

SEE ALSO: Take A Tour Of The Maker's Mark Distillery

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Justin Bieber's Comments About Manny Pacquiao Have Insulted An Entire Nation

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Justin Bieber concert

Canadian pop singer Justin Bieber has been threatened with a ban from entering the Philippines after ridiculing Filipino boxing star Manny Pacquiao’s knockout loss to Juan Manuel Marquez earlier this month.

Bieber, 18, posted pictures on his public Instagram account of Pacquiao, 34, flat on his stomach after being knocked down by Marquez.

In one photograph, a photoshopped image of the Disney character Simba was seen leaning over Pacquiao, with the caption, “Dad wake up”.

In another mock image, late singer Michael Jackson is pictured in his famous leaning pose from the Smooth Criminal video, mirroring the stance of Pacquiao just before he hit the floor of the boxing ring.

Indignation over Bieber’s insult reached the Philippines Congress, with seven law-makers filing a resolution demanding an apology from the singer for the “distasteful comments … lest he be declared persona non grata”.

“Mr. Bieber should have known that the Hon. Pacquiao has reached his stature as such as a result of sheer hard work, determination and firm belief in God, and despite such stature best exemplifies humility and grace even in defeat,” the congressmen said.

They added that it was not only Pacquiao who Bieber insulted, but also the entire population.

Pacquiao released a statement saying he would pray for Bieber.

Bieber - who is known for pop hits such as Boyfriend, and whose fans are referred to as "Beliebers" - addressed the issue on his social media account: "If they were Beliebers I know they wouldn't leave my side over [a] boxing opinion I have."


Justin Bieber - Boyfriend on MUZU.TV .

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Celebrities Tweet Their Outrage Over Instagram's New Terms

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tiffani thiessen saved by the bell

On Tuesday, in the tweet heard 'round the world, former "Saved By The Bell" star Tiffani Amber Thiessen announced she was quitting Instagram.

The shocking news came after the popular photo-sharing app updated its terms of service Monday night to say that it may, someday, allow advertisers to repurpose user-taken images.

The former "Kelly Kapowski," along with a slew of other celebrities such as Olivia Wilde and Anderson Cooper, did not take this well.

Stars expressed their outrage — ironically via Twitter — over Instagram having the right to post their photos in advertisements without notifying or compensating them.

It's an especially touchy issue for celebrities, whose personal photos could then technically be used for public advertisements, thus hurting their business and brand.

Model Coco Rocha wrote a blog post in which she says Instagram is being turned into "The world's worst modeling agency." 

"They can sell your username, your profile picture and any photos you’ve taken with the platform to anyone they want ," Rocha writes. "Oh, and you won’t see a penny of that sale. In effect, for me personally, they have become the worst modeling agency in history."

Amid Wednesday's very public backlash, Instagram co-founder Kevin Systrom issued a statement responding to criticism of the app's new terms of service.

In the statement, Systrom apologizes for the confusion the new policy caused and said, "To be clear: it is not our intention to sell your photos ... We are working on updated language in the terms to make sure this is clear."

While Instagram's new terms of service don't go into effect until January 16, 2013, celebs are already speaking out about their feelings on the issue:

Tiffani Amber Thiessen Tweet

Olivia Wilde Instagram Tweet

Anderson Cooper Instagram Tweet

Khloe Kardashian Instagram Tweet

Pink Instagram Tweet

Sophia Bush Instagram Tweet

Emma ROberts Tweet

Mark Hoppus Tweet

Kate Walsh Instagram Tweet

Deadmau5 Tweet

Seth Green Instagram tweet

Coco Rocha tweet

Coco Rocha Tweet

Coco Rocha Tweet

Celebs may need to just take a breath before deleting their accounts and leaving their hundreds of thousands of followers behind.

As we told you yesterday regarding Facebook's similar terms, "A lot of people freaked out then and said they were going to quit Facebook because they felt violated. Today, Facebook has more than 1 billion users and has yet to sell photos you post to anyone."

SEE ALSO: No, you're not going to quit Instagram >

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7 Celebrities Who Attempted To Write Fiction

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James Franco

What's a celeb to do between red-carpet events? Why, write a book, of course!

According to Publishers Weekly, the jack-of-all-trades James Franco has just sold his debut poetry collection to Graywolf Press, and it's set to be released in 2014.

Franco is already a published prose author whose 2010 book of short stories, Palo Alto, is, according to The New York Times, filled with "nihilistic violence and gratuitous gore."

But Franco is hardly the first A-lister (or C-lister, for that matter) to take up his pen. Here, a look at six other celebrities who wrote fiction, with varying degrees of success.

1. The English Roses, by Madonna

What it's about: The Material Girl's 2003 debut, a children's picture book, concerns an outsider girl named Binah who inspires jealousy in four other girls because they believe she leads the perfect life.

But the "moral" of the story is that Binah, who was based on Madonna's daughter Lourdes, is neither rich nor spoiled, and is actually quite lonely.

What the critics said: The Guardian's Kate Kellaway criticizes the book for its mediocrity and superfluity, arguing that The English Roses is little more than "an accessory for those curious about Madonna."

Why, wonders Kellaway, would the pop diva want to impersonate a "fragile primary-school teacher in a flowery frock?" Madge should "stick to what she knows best."



2. Junior, or Oscar De La Mancha, The Wembling Warrior, and the People I Like the Least. Not a Novel. A written project from the normal, well adjusted and 'No I don't have issues with my father!' mind of … junior (meaning me), by Macaulay Culkin

What it's about: Less a novel than a post-modern series of vignettes that include detours into comics, poetry, quizzes, and an open letter to Britney Spears, 2006's Junior is very, very loosely held together by a series of anecdotes documenting the life of "Money Monkey Boy," a former child star.

What the critics said:Publisher's Weekly calls Junior a "self-indulgently infantile book" that "looks and reads more like a book-length zine."

Though Culkin insists that Junior the character is different than Culkin the author, they have quite a lot in common, and Junior's only real value is as a "calculated piece of celebrity implosion" that offers a "weirdly compelling" look into Culkin's mind.



3. L.A. Candy, by Lauren Conrad

What it's about: This novel, which follows "Jane Roberts" as she moves to Hollywood and eventually gets her own reality show — is a juicy, thinly-veiled account of Conrad's stint as one of the stars of the MTV reality show The Hills. 

Released in 2009, the book is the first of the quick-to-cash-in L.A. Candy series. Its sequel, Sweet Little Lies, and the series' final installment, Sugar and Spice, were both released in 2010.

What the critics said: Entertainment Weekly's Lisa Schwarzbaum calls the novel a "dismal portent of the future of pop culture, disguised as escapist fiction," adding that Conrad's young fans "might like a book-shaped object as a keepsake."

L.C. may think she can do anything, says Schwarzbaum, but the one thing she can't do is write a "novel."



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This Moving Video Showcases The Top Heroes Of 2012

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From shootings to hurricanes, 2012 had its fair share of tragic moments.

But in each sad situation emerged heroes and now HooplaHa.com has put together a four-minute-long video honoring the year's most remarkable individuals ... and even life-saving pets.

From Batman and the real-life Ryan Gosling to sports stars and concerned neighbors, see who did good in 2012:

SEE ALSO: YouTube's most buzzed about videos of the year >

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Here's The First Kate Upton Photo From Mercedes' Super Bowl Ad Shoot

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Mercedes-Benz gave Business Insider a first look at how Kate Upton is going to look in its 60-second long Super Bowl spot.

While fans of the Sport's Illustrated swimsuit cover model might hope that she'll be showing skin — a favorite tactic among Super Bowl advertisers— Mercedes-Benz USA CEO Steve Cannon told Business Insider that "this is an upscale moment. This isn't a Carl's Junior kind of thing, she's in an upscale cocktail dress."

Here's a behind-the-scenes look at the portion of the commercial that was filmed in New Orleans, where the game will be played this February.

Mercedes gave Business Insider the first shot of Kate Upton looking glamorous in the Super Bowl spot:Kate Upton Mercedes Super Bowl Ad

She Instagrammed a photo of her mom on set:Kate Upton Mercedes Super Bowl mom instagram

Upton will presumably appear on the red carpet in the cloaked car:Mercedes behind scenes Super Bowl ad

Mercedes decided to shoot part of the ad in New Orleans to help bring jobs and attention to the struggling city. Part of the commercial takes place in the French Quarter's Napoleon House:Mercedes behind scenes Super Bowl ad

Here's director Dante Ariola getting ready to shoot the spot, which was created by ad agency Merkley+Partners:Mercedes behind scenes Super Bowl ad

SEE ALSO: Here's what Kate Upton and Usher will actually do in the Super Bowl ad>

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Sam Donaldson Arrested For DUI

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Sam DonaldsonVeteran ABC newsman and political correspondent Sam Donaldson was arrested for DUI in Delaware after driving off the shoulder of the road.

The incident happened on the night of Dec. 1 after the 78-year-old was pulled over for a traffic violation by the Lewes Police Department.

The newsman, who was apparently "very cooperative," subsequently failed a field sobriety test and was booked for driving under the influence.

Donaldson, who currently appears on Sunday-morning news show "This Week" and contributes to ABC News Radio, has managed to keep the incident under wraps -- until now.

Donaldson is scheduled for a court appearance at a later date.

SEE ALSO: Donald Trump wins $5M legal victory over Miss USA >

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How France's Most Beloved Actor Ended Up At War With Hollande's Socialist Government

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gerard depardieu

Gérard Dépardieu has won every acting award ever invented in France. He was nominated for an Oscar in 1990. He's also dated nearly every famous French actress that came along between 1970 and 1990.

And now he's left the country, claiming taxes are too high.

In September, President Francois Hollande proposed a new 75 percent levy on all earnings over 1 million euros.

Last week, Dépardieu — a wealthy man — announced he had purchased a house in a small Belgian town just over the French border in a bid to escape the tax.

Learning of the news, Prime Minister Jean-Marc Ayrault called the move "petty." In response, Dépardieu wrote an open letter to Ayrault denouncing the government's own "petty" treatment of him, and saying he would be giving up his French passport.

"I'm leaving because you now believe success, creativity, talent — really, anything that makes one unique — should be punished."

According to Libération, he later joked he had received a Russian passport from Vladmir Putin. (Dépardieu has appeared in a number of ads for Russian firms.)

Many French aren't seeing the punchline. Fellow actor Philippe Torrenton this week composed a "savage" response to Dépardieu's attitude. "The problem, Gérard, is that your roadtrips always end up in the same ditch — you only think of yourself, your cash, your dictator frends..."

According to a new poll, 56% of France disapproves of Dépardieu's actions — although just 28 percent of those identifying as right-leaning do. Far-right sympathizer and fellow screen legend Bridgette Bardot recently voiced her solidarity with Dépardieu's decision.

It's too early to say how the saga will end. The 75 percent levy has actually not gone into force, but most think it's a foregone conclusion. Nor is Dépardieu the only French one-percenter to break out of the Hexagon. LVMH boss Bernard Arnault also recently switched his address to Belgium, although he swore he would fulfill his fiscal obligations to the republic.  

Meanwhile, you can catch Dépardieu in Ang Lee's new film "Life of Pi" now in theaters. 

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Martha Stewart CEO Steps Down After Disastrous Year (MSO)

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Martha Stewart

Dec. 19 (Bloomberg) -- Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia Inc., the company founded by home-decor guru Martha Stewart, said Chief Executive Officer Lisa Gersh will step down, part of an effort to bolster its merchandising business.

A search is under way for a successor, the New York-based company said today in a statement. Gersh, who was only named to the CEO job five months ago, will retain the position during the transition period.

After sluggish advertising sales in its media business contributed to four straight years of losses and declining revenue, Martha Stewart Living is focusing more on selling merchandise through retailers. The company entered an agreement in late 2011 with J.C. Penney Co., a deal that will start boosting revenue by early 2013, according to the statement.

  • NOTE: Sales have been falling at MSO for four straight years. The company laid off 10 percent of its 600-person workforce a few weeks ago. See "Martha Stewart's Empire Collapses."

“We are now increasing our capabilities in merchandising and plan to take full advantage of that opportunity for the benefit of our shareholders,” Stewart, who serves as non- executive chairman, said in the statement.

The company said earlier this year that it would shut down its Whole Living magazine and turn its Everyday Food title into an online publication. It’s also cutting jobs as part of a plan to save $45 million to $47 million annually. In addition to the print changes, Martha Stewart Living is revamping its broadcast division to focus more on Internet services, including AOL Inc. and Hulu LLC.

The shares fell 5 percent to $2.45 at 9:55 a.m. in New York. The stock had tumbled 41 percent this year through yesterday.

Fourth-quarter merchandising revenue is expected to 15 percent higher than a year earlier, the company said. That business brings adjusted profit margins of about 70 percent, excluding interest, taxes, depreciation and amortization, Martha Stewart Living said.

--With assistance from Sarah Frier in New York. Editors: Nick Turner, James Callan

To contact the reporter on this story: Nick Turner in New York at nturner7@bloomberg.net

To contact the editor responsible for this story: Nick Turner at nturner7@bloomberg.net

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HOUSE OF THE DAY: Pharrell Williams' Miami Penthouse Hits The Market For $16.8 Million

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Pharrell Williams Penthouse

Rapper and producer Pharrell Williams has put his Miami penthouse on the market for a staggering $16.8 million, according to NME.

The three-floor home is 9,080 square feet in total, with five bedrooms and six and a half bathrooms. The massive penthouse also has unparalleled 360-degree views of the Miami skyline, a pool, elevator entry into the foyer, and massive terraces.

The building is located in Miami's business district, Brickell, and is available through Coldwell Banker Residential Real Estate.

Pharrell's pad is right on the ocean.



His house has an "opposite fishbowl effect" where he can see out, but no one can see in through the glass windows.



The expansive dining room can seat 12 people easily and has 180-degree views.



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Why Solo Rock Stars Are More Likely To Die Young

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Amy Winehouse

Musicians in solo acts are more likely to die than their peers in bands, a new study reports.

They found that solo performers (such as Amy Winehouse), were around twice as likely to die early as those in a band (like the Rolling Stones), irrespective of whether they were European (9.8 percent vs 5.4 percent) or North American (22.8 percent vs 10.2 percent).

The peer support that comes from bandmates seems to protect the musician from self-destruction with drugs or alcohol.

The study was published in the journal BMJ Open, an open access journal run by the British Medical Association. A press release from the journal has the details:

The authors included 1489 North American and European rock and pop stars over a 50 year period between 1956 (Elvis Presley) and 2006 (Regina Spektor, The Arctic Monkeys, and Snow Patrol).

Their achievements were determined from international polls and top 40 chart successes, while details of their personal lives/childhoods were drawn from a range of music and official websites, published biographies, and anthologies.

During the 50 year period, 137 (9.2%) famous rock/pop stars died. The average age of death was 45 for North American stars and 39 for those from Europe.

The gap in life expectancy between rock and pop stars and the general population widened consistently until 25 years after fame had been achieved, after which death rates began to approach those of the general population—but only for European stars.

They also found that those who had drug and alcohol abuse problems were more likely to have suffered a difficult or abusive childhood than those who died of other causes. These childhood traumas include physical, sexual, or emotional abuse; living with a chronically depressed, suicidal, mentally or physically ill person; living with a substance abuser; having a close relative in prison; and coming from a broken home or one in which domestic violence featured.

Four out of five dead stars who had more than one unfavourable childhood factor eventually died from substance misuse or violence-related causes, the release says.

www.bmjopen.bmj.com/lookup/doi/10.1136/bmjopen-2012-002089

SEE ALSO: The 25 Unhealthiest States In America

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The Highest-Grossing Films Of 2012

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the dark knight rises batman

In a year ripe with superheroes, sequels, and one last bite from the Twilight franchise, the box-office was booming in 2012.

We've taken a look at the 15 top-grossing films of the year worldwide.  

If you were a Bat in black, a Disney toon, or Kristen Stewart, the box-office bowed in your favor. 

We know "The Avengers" and "The Dark Knight Rises" were among the best performances at theaters this year. See what else joins them on the list.

15. "The Lorax": $348.8 million

Dr. Seuss' book adaptation was the first box-office surprise of the year, debuting to the third-highest March opening with $70.2 million.

(Box Office Mojo)



14. "Taken 2": $363.4 million

Critics may not have loved Liam Neeson's return as ex-CIA agent Bryan Mills, but audiences couldn't have been more thrilled to see the sequel to the 2009 action thriller. The film opened to the third-highest October debut with $50 million.

(Box Office Mojo)



13. "Snow White and the Huntsman": $396.4 million

Unlike Julia Roberts' "Mirror, Mirror," this Snow White had a smart marketing campaign geared toward men (This Is No Fairy Tale), plus the star power of Kristen Stewart. The film had the fourth-largest opening of the year.

(Box Office Mojo)



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Why The Entertainment Industry's Release Strategy Creates Piracy

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wreck-it ralph

In the empirical literature over copyright enforcement and the internet one correlation keeps resurfacing: the fewer legal options there are, the more piracy there is.

If you want people to buy media, you have to offer it for sale. If it's not for sale, they won't buy it, but many of them will still want to watch or hear or play it, and will turn to the darknet to get – for free – the media that no one will sell to them.

This isn't a surprising research finding. Everyone who's ever run a business or worked in any kind of sales job knows that rule one is to make a product that people want and then offer it at a price they're willing to pay. Doing this won't always make you rich, but no one ever got rich without starting from there.

But whenever this amazing finding is revealed anew, the entertainment industry's PR arm springs into motion to tell us all that people just shouldn't take stuff without paying for it, full stop. Taking things without paying for them is stealing. All those people who downloaded Wreck it Ralph or any of the other movies and TV shows that were released in the US months before their UK release are just crooks, and they're bad, and they should stop. Because stealing is wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong.

Let's set aside the rhetorical dishonesty of equating copyright infringement with theft for a moment (the law distinguishes between the two for a good reason – the former is a regulatory violation, the latter is a crime) and focus on why the entertainment industry would ever want to defend its right not to sell us the things we want to buy from them.

Like most things that successful businesses do, defending the right not to sell stuff makes a certain, perverse kind of sense. In the case of Wreck it Ralph and other movies, the UK distributors have their own pipelines that have different schedules from their US counterparts.

The US industry times blockbuster movie releases to the Thanksgiving holiday weekend (which isn't observed in the UK), the UK has bank holidays and half-terms that the US doesn't observe, so the industry has a hard time lining up the releases of all its biggest investments/cash cows with the dates on which people are most actively buying their cinema tickets.

When it comes to TV shows, there's a real advantage to being able to wait until they have run for a series or two in the US so that its audience size and popularity can be demonstrated before licensing it for UK distribution. But this means that the UK broadcasts tend to lag behind the US ones, sometimes by years.

Today it's hard to find any knowledgeable person who thinks that making more money by delaying a release to an optimal date is possible, except to the extent that the knowledgeable person is selling something.

That's not surprising. Lots of businesses would be more profitable if their customers arranged their purchasing choices for maximum seller profitability. But in the real world of markets, businesses have to confine their profit maximisation strategies to schemes that customers are willing to go along with.

So cinemas can charge hefty markups on soft drinks, but not totally insane markups. Once the markups reach a certain threshold, the losses from people who sneak in their own drinks will outstrip the extra profits from the higher margins earned on "honest" customers, and prices have to come down.

This compliance threshold is a natural limit on all businesses – the cap on earnings represented by customers' stubborn refusal to put your corporate profits ahead of their personal good.

But there is a way around this: externalising the enforcement costs.

Externalising is the practice of pushing a cost off of a firm's books and onto the public's side of the ledger. For example, Selfridges could save a tonne of money on security guards if plainclothes police could be persuaded to station themselves at discreet intervals around the department store from opening to closing.

If the police could be persuaded to stand outside the entrances all night, Selfridges could even dispense with the expense of locks and keys for its doors. Around-the-clock police stakeouts are much more expensive than locks and burglar alarms, but Selfridges doesn't pay police salaries we all do, through taxes.

The modest rise in taxes that Selfridges would have to pay for its share of the police guarding its doors would be more than offset by the tremendous savings it made from abandoning its private security arrangements.

To the extent that corporations are charged with maximising shareholder return, they are machines designed to externalise their costs. If there's no penalty for dumping raw waste into drinking water, and there is a cost for processing it before discharging it, corporations can argue that they are legally required to poison our water. To do otherwise is to needlessly spend money that could otherwise be paid to

the shareholders. This turns out not to be merely a theoretical problem – any time a corporation can save money by sticking the public with its problems you'll find corporations doing just that, even if it costs thousands of times more to decontaminate the water supply than it does simply to treat the sludge before it's dumped.

In a real marketplace, the ability of entertainment companies to stagger their releases would be curtailed by the willingness of customers to put profits ahead of their own desire to watch TV or movies when the rest of the world is talking about them on Twitter and Facebook– and not six months later, timed to coincide with a bank holiday. However, by equating watching TV at "the wrong time" with theft, the entertainment companies have been pretty successful in convincing politicians that the public should foot the bill for this decision through costly market interventions, up to and including a branch of the City of London police charged with finding copyright infringers.

Which brings us back to the empirical evidence on lawful alternatives and piracy rates. The fact that people eschew the black market when there is a legitimate alternative tells you that they're not thieves looking to steal. Rather, like the notional customer who sneaks in her own fizzy drinks rather than paying for the cinema's insane markups, they are potential customers whose purchases have been forfeited by a business that has violated rule number one: offer a product that people want to buy at the price they're willing to pay.

Like all externalisation, making the public pay for the profit-maximisation scheme of delaying release windows is a net loss.

The marginal increase in profits from release delays are gobbled up by the terrible costs of policing the public through Draconian laws like the Digital Economy Act and absurdities like the censorship orders that force ISPs to block The Pirate Bay. What's more, research has shown that when lawful customers are sent to the black market through the unwillingness to sell, they sometimes linger there.

When NBC pulled its digital offerings from the iTunes store, researchers found that downloads from The Pirate Bay of NBC programmes shot up, but so did downloads of programmes from other broadcasters – and they stayed high even when NBC restored the lawful alternative to Apple.

In other words, when the entertainment industry asks us all to pay for its profit maximisation strategy of not selling right now it actually creates more pirates – and then asks us to pay to police them, too.

This all makes perfect sense from the entertainment industry's perspective. So long as the salaries of chest-beating lobbyists who wander Whitehall weeping about theft are lower than the incremental profits represented by release windows, they're ahead of the game.

But we all lose by this subsidy. The entertainment industry's pennies cost us pounds to police. So long as our politicians are willing to open the public purse to these scroungers, they will go on cheating the system to maximise their shareholder returns.

This article originally appeared on guardian.co.uk

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The Spice Girls Musical Has Absolutely No Redeeming Features Whatsoever

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spice girls viva foreverThe Spice Girls musical, Viva Forever!, has absolutely no redeeming features whatsoever.

In a more cerebral age, it used to take something like Laurence Olivier walking out on to the stage of the Royal Court at the first night of The Entertainer to constitute a major theatrical event. These days, it’s not Archie Rice but a musical about the Spice Girls that gets the punters into a state of near-frenzy.

When one is up against the tsunami of hype that the publicists of Viva Forever! have managed to whip up, it is awfully tempting to try to be a really hip old daddy-o, go with the flow, and, after lighting up a Hamlet cigar and taking out the earplugs, dispensing the five stars that the exclamation mark would appear to require.

One cannot, however, ignore the old tosh-o-meter, when the needle goes off the scale to register a show that’s so bad, it ought, if there were any justice, to be accorded a minus-star rating. This show is not just bad, it is definitively, monumentally and historically bad.

I shall not dwell on the plot because, goodness knows, Jennifer Saunders, its writer, certainly hasn’t done. Its producer, Judy Craymer, may profess to have spent some money on it, but I have no idea where it has gone.

It does not manifest itself in the set design – which is basic to the extent of being like Play School’s – and, as for the songs, they are uniformly scummy, scratchy and screechy. There is no acting to speak of, either, so I shall not identify any of the girls who appear in it, lest they be subjected to recriminations.

Thrown together without any great thought, and ugly in every respect, the show is a fitting symbol of the me-me-me generation, whose members take the Spice Girls as their role models because they demonstrate that fame and fortune can these days be quickly, easily and pointlessly obtained by just about anybody.

Viva Forever! marks the West End coming to an unequivocal dead end.

To June 1; www.vivaforeverthemusical.com

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